The Challenge.

Life is challenging, we’d be bored if it weren’t.

 

We are all faced with challenges and adverse conditions in our lives.  How we act and react to those challenges, defines our character.  Each of us has the ability to persevere and thrive.

GOAL+ACTION STEPS=RESULTS.

About Kari Arvisais

I have 25+ years experience in service to people, businesses, organizations and animals overcome problems, crisis, challenges and thrive.
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5 Responses to The Challenge.

  1. Patrick says:

    I’ve come upon Day 1. By chance or cooincidence; everything happens for a reason. The remaining 29 days will be of interest and no doubt have been placed before me by a higher power. “When the student is ready” …

    Psychologically Hardy people are usually viewed as Realists by those too afraid to address troubled situations. They sit on their hands waiting for someone else to “throw the stinky stuff on the table”. 80% of crisis are created by those who sit by and watch the train wreck begin. Psychologically Hardy people can’t watch a train wreck happen. People want scrambled eggs but refuse to accept the reality that broken shells will occur.

    What is the difference between being a Realist and being viewed as Negative?

    I look forward the the next 30 days.

    • Kari Arvisais says:

      Patrick,
      Thank you so much for “stumbling” onto Peace of Mind Space. Funny that you mention when the student is ready to learn, I posted that yesterday (Day 28). No matter where we are in life, it is a new day, a new challenge, a new opportunity. My gift to you is the sharing of this blog. Feel encouraged, empowered, inspired to be your best and achieve the results that you want in life. You can navigate the 30-day challenge at your own pace, it’s your choice to challenge yourself.
      Thank you for being both the student and the teacher.
      Be well,
      Kari

    • Kari Arvisais says:

      Patrick, for me, being realistic is striving for the best despite the negative circumstances. Being negative is staying stuck.

  2. Kari says:

    Kelli,
    Thank you for your thoughtful reply and including your personal growth formula
    GROWTH = CHALLENGE + SUPPORT.
    I am confident that your words, your actions and your convictions will continue to inspire and motivate people to overcome their challenges. We all have the ability to persevere.

  3. kelli says:

    Here is a paper i wrote in my psyc class..you may enjoy :)

    GROWTH = CHALLENGE + SUPPORT
    I am a firm believer that a person cannot succeed, or obtain their goals in life, without also accepting failure in their lives. I frequently remind the youth that I work with that I would not have the knowledge or understanding that I have today had I not failed so many times at the many games in life. When I think back on the negative choices I have make in the past, I am always able to come up with at least one positive aspect that came with each negative experience. I do not dwell on those “not so good” decisions, but I do let myself be reminded of them, as to not make the same mistakes over again. I also remind myself, frequently, that I am not able to change the past, so that I am able to look towards the future with certainty, never allowing what I am not able to change effect the goals that I wish to accomplish. My mother always said, “Kelli, you can do anything you want. Reach for the stars!” so that is what I will do.
    Positive psychology is a topic that has passionately caught my attention. I think that for a person to grow, they must give way to the “tried and true” and make room for “the new” and “change.” Without this characteristic, we would not have all the new inventions, creations, philosophies, and methods of doing things that continuously expand in our lives today. Dr. Martin Seligman, founder of Positive Psychology, found that people having buffers against extreme stress more readily overcame obstacles in their lives. These buffer traits include: courage, optimism, interpersonal skills, work ethic, hope, honesty, responsibility, and perseverance. During Dr. Seligmans studies, he also identified several buffering traits that protect people against stress and adversity, which would later be developed into a framework by Dr. Salvatori Maddi known as “hardiness.” Psychological hardiness refers to a persons ability to stand in defiance to challenges, and bounce back from failure. People with psychological hardiness have a valued sense of commitment to life and work. They are also engaged in circumstances going on around them, and see challenges as a way to grow, rather than a danger to be avoided. Psychological Hardy people also hang when the going gets tough, and believe that “where the is a will, there is a way.” If a person has a stress hardy personality, they deal with stress without allowing it to cause an even greater problem by learning to control how they react to the problems in a more flexible, confident, and less destructive way. The way a psychological hardy person deals with stress is known as “the 3 C’s,” which are challenge, control, and commitment.
    The first C “challenge,” deals with how a person perceives events that occur in their lives. Psychological hardy individuals see problems as challenges, rather than threats. This means that these people will learn, grow, and develop rather than retreat from their problems. They welcome new situations as opportunities while getting busy to find solutions. In most situations, they will exceed expectations in performance, leadership, and health enhancing thoughts and behaviors, while looking at life with a “give it your best shot” attitude.
    The second C in psychological hardiness is “control.” There are two distinct types of control, Internal Locus control and External Locus control. Individuals who rate high on the psychological hardiness scale have Internal Locus of Control, meaning that they perceive themselves as “in charge,” and “responsible” for the outcomes of their lives, feel in control of their destiny and direction in life, and have a strong sense of self-efficacy. They also understand that by intentionally developing and holding onto a positive, optimistic, hopeful outlook, they can determine their reaction to any predicament they may face, and feel confident to go into action. People who rank low on the psychological hardiness scale have External Locus of Control, and tend to believe that they have little or no control over what happens to them which leads to a sense of helplessness and passivity. They tend to feel powerless, and be “blamers,” and “complainers” while believing that what happens to them is due to fate or destiny, and they have no influence over it. In the end, people with Internal Locus of Control end up being more successful because they have a realistic attitude, and focus on changing the things they can and accepting the things they cannot.
    The third C in psychological hardiness is “commitment.” People who are high on commitment are fully engaged in what they are doing despite stressful changes that may be taking place which helps them to feel important, and that their actions are worthwhile. When a person is committed to family, work, community, friends, religion, and themselves, it gives their lives meaning and they have a sense of purpose. When a person is committed to a goal, they tend to be more motivated and put in more effort which helps them to overcome occasional losses and remain steadfast in their efforts. They give activities their best, not their perfect, effort and have curiosity in what they are doing instead of feeling detached and isolated.
    As a person engages in the daily practice of hardiness, they may be surprised to find that they are not only surviving, but that they are also thriving on adversity. Once the person sees themselves thriving, they are able to function even stronger, better, and more joyfully than they did before the stress/hardship that they had previously encountered. An IBT study actually showed that psychological hardiness will enhance an individuals performance, leadership, stamina, conduct, mood, and mental/physical health due to the fact that these persons gain courage and capability to turn adversity into advantage.
    I believe that I have gained psychological hardiness over the years. I go into every new experience with a positive, “I can do it” attitude, but I also accept the fact that I may fail, maybe even a few times. I also know that with each failed attempt, I will gain a lesson learned. This helps me to maintain the outlook that I will do much better the next time, if not succeed. With each new goal that I set for myself, I know and accept the fact that there is a great chance that I may fail, in some sort of sense or standard. I use these failed experiences to build, and construct new ways of doing things, which thus in turn, leads to my mind searching for creative and maybe original solutions. With each step I take, I obtain and evaluate both positive and negative aspects, go with the flow, and attempt to grow from them. Experience, both good and bad, is a positive thing for me, as I am able to use them for advice, both for myself and others. Self-gratification comes from knowing although I may have made some bad choices, maybe I can save others from doing the same.
    As I speak from my heart and mind, without shame, I know that my possibly embarrassing/shameful acts of the past will do more good than bad by me using them to help direct others. By caring for the futures of others, while being true to myself, I accept and admit “not so proud” personal experiences with the passion to serve others. As I help a person deal with personal conflicts, they begin to grow, and I grow with them. I am no longer just one individual or voice. I allow my mind, heart, and soul to connect with them as I help them, through my own story, reflections, and education. Then together we band in unity, a force much greater than one. We become one another’s rock, there to support and encourage one another. Through the newfound compassion for one another, our strength grows, and we are able to pass along the torch of understanding, sympathy, hope, and love to each person we encounter.
    I believe that God put me on this Earth for a reason. Maybe he knew that I had the strength and will to overcome the many obstacles he placed in my life. Maybe he placed them there because he wanted me to use my knowledge to help others who are less resilient. At one point in my life, I did not understand why so many bad experiences/traumas, had to happen to me. Now I am thankful for even the most horrific events that occurred in With each mountain that I had to climb, my strength and courage climbed with it. Now, not only am I becoming professionally educated on how to deal with the many types of persons, victims, moods, behaviors, traumas, circumstances, and standards, I also have my life’s many experiences to go with it. Knowledge not only comes from what we are taught, what we read in books, what we see around us, or what we see on television. KNOWLEDGE IS LIVING IT! Thankfully, I had my family. They were my “rock.” They were the foundation that kept me grounded in times of turbulence, so that I was able to stand against the storm in order to withstand the test of time. Now I will use what I have learned. I will be the foundation for others, or the loving family they may not have to support them in their times of need. I will never give up hope that we all have what it takes, and I will bestow my courage onto others!

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